Learning to Let Go

Less Is More

The twelve-steppers have a saying that goes, “Let go and let God.” If you’re getting hung up on the G-word in the second part of that saying, don’t fret…we’re here to take a look at the first half. Sometimes doing nothing and getting out of our own way is the best source of action. Most likely you are traveling this path of sobriety because of the things you “do.” It is the action you take that has led you here. By learning how to do less or nothing at all, we will gain a huge advantage against addictive thoughts and behaviors.

Adapt and Improvise

Those who suffer from addiction also suffer from delusions about control. Control is an idea.  It is a bedtime story. It is a warm fuzzy blanket that lets us feel brave and secure from the monsters under the bed. However, control does not exist.  It is a figment of our imaginations. Don’t take our word for it though. Try to control every aspect of your day.  Try to control other people. I think you will soon see, as we did, that control is exhausting, frustrating and fruitless. To live happy, successful lives, we need to learn to let go. We need to adapt and change rather than try to control. Control is not a useful tool in recovery. In contrast, flexibility, adaptability, detachment and meditation ARE useful tools and we will learn how to use them like a master carpenter.

Be Here Now

In one sense and at its roots, addiction can be thought of as the refusal to accept the present moment. It is an attempt to mold the now into something it isn’t. In other words, an attempt to control it. Addicts have a very hard time being fully present in the moment. Now, if your present moment is pleasant, like getting a massage, we have no problem being present fully. It’s when the now is unpleasant that we seek a reversal of this feeling or a way to suppress it. Drugs work marvelously well in this regard. They change the present moment immediately. They are an instant replacement of the now. However, the duration is short and the cost of this solution is very high. We are searching for a long term, low-cost method in dealing with the present and our place within it. 

Spiritual Liberation

The name Carl Jung is familiar to many members of Alcoholics Anonymous, including its founder, Bill Wilson. Jung proposed that the yearning for addictive substances is really a yearning for communion with the higher self or spirit. In essence, he thought of alcoholics as people desperate to have a spiritual experience and only through a process of spiritual enlightenment could the addict emerge as a new person free from the bondage of addiction. He often referred to alcoholics/addicts as “frustrated mystics.”

A New Sheriff in Town

Addiction begins when we throw away our free will and turn it over to our substances of choice. They become our ruler. We want to encourage you to revolt against this dictator. We encourage you to stage a coup in your own mind and elect a new leader. The new leader’s aim will be to spread love, compassion and well-being. Like a good king, this will be the new leader’s aim.  

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Barn Life is uniquely special. As someone who has had long stretches of sobriety with "traditional" communities and methods, Barn Life stepped in when I started struggling during the pandemic and said "traditional" methods failed to help.The staff here are exceptional. This is a truly subjective statement, but it is my honest opinion that the people from the owner (Hi Matt!) to EVERYONE else works there because they believe in the work and want to share the tools they found.Barn Life and their little sibling, Peer Mental Wellness were the launchpad from a shell of an existence to person with self-love/respect, and a life-mission of personal development.

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Barn life is probably one of the most amazing facilities you could ever attend when it comes to mental illness. This was the first place that popped up when I was searching for help and I’m so thankful that it did. The environment is very therapeutic, the staff is awesome, and the group discussions and activities were so helpful in me understanding what I was experiencing. Do not hesitate to be a part of this place. It’s literally a game changer. I was only there for 6 weeks but I wished I stayed at least 6 months. Ever since returning home, I’ve been much happier and my perspective has changed dramatically. I’ve done things and participated in events at my college that I never thought I would be able to do. This place is truly amazing and I’m forever grateful that I found this place.

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Through trial and error of trying to stay sober this program is definitely the most caring and supporting of them all if anyone needs help and is willing to help themselves I suggest barnlife they will for a fact give you the push you need and the tools to keep you going

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My daughter has been at Barn Life Recovery now for two months. It was my last resort to send her 9 hours away from me. She has been in drug and mental health rehabs in and out for two years. This was my last stitch effort to save my daughter and get her back to herself. Alyssa and I spoke multiple times before deciding. Their willingness to do everything for her and the different teams they have work with them is amazing. My daughter is happy again and clean and sober. She loves it there in their outpatient program. They restore your faith in humanity. They help restore someone who is broken in so many places to themselves. They have put the light back in my daughters eyes. They are committed to helping each person who truly wants the help. They assist in helping them get jobs and be responsible members of society. I recommend their program to anyone wanting to recover from drug, alcohol and mental health.Thank you to all the people at Barn Life who have made my daughter smile and bring the light back to her eyes. I am truly grateful.DawnaLee

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