The Importance of Practicing Self Love

A woman in a yellow dress smiling and hugging herself, experiencing self love

Experiencing a Lack of Self Love

 

Let’s try a thought experiment to illustrate a point concerning the way we treat our bodies. We’ll begin by imagining that our body is a house. We’ll also pretend that we care nothing for this house. We do not love it. In fact, we believe we do not even own it. We only rent it from some faceless landlord. 

Furthermore, we neglect the home, we abuse it, and we hate being there. There is no self love here. Before long we realize that we have taken up residence in a body that we no longer recognize. 

We have allowed a sacred space to become overgrown with the weeds of despair. Drugs, alcohol and destructive relationships become welcome distractions from the true underlying problems. 

 

Our Holy Palace

 

This is an awful, dystopian way to view our bodies. However, we can also look at the other side of this coin. In this vision, we love our home. We own it outright. Because it is all ours, we take care of it. We do not allow anything to enter that will harm the peaceful environment. Strangers are welcomed only after we remind them they are entering a temple. 

We no longer view ourselves as a cheap rental to be disregarded as we have learned to set boundaries. This is a key point and one that you should spend time to meditate upon often. Though the physical body may be attacked and damaged, our spirit always remains intact – provided we guard it like a temple. 

Once we learn how to protect and nurture our internal sacred space, other people’s actions become irrelevant to our own. We become the masters of ourselves.

 

The Five Elements

 

The question then becomes “How do we best take care of this sacred space?” One way is by studying and practicing the Chinese philosophy of the Five Elements. The Five Elements are a tool. Knowledge of them helps us to be masters of ourselves. They help us to recognize and stifle destructive habits and tendencies before they grow out of control. 

Only then, once we have weeded and tended our garden can we help others create their own gardens. The proof of a good gardener is in their garden. The proof of a great teacher is in the quality of their students. 

The Five Elements are an ancient way Chinese sages saw the world. It is a relationship between different kinds of energy or qi and how those energies relate to one another. The Five Elements can be used to better understand our world and our places within it.

 

We Are Nature

 

We often hear about the need to take care of the natural world. While it’s admirable to want to preserve our green space, this outlook is wrong-headed. Human beings are a natural resource. 

It is our philosophy that we are products of nature and share the same energies as nature. The principles that govern nature also govern human beings. Understanding and maximizing those natural tendencies is paramount. 

Often we are forced into roles we cannot assume. Instead of maximizing our natural gifts, we sometimes adopt a “one way fits all” philosophy. This is a catastrophic error. People are not machines. 

On the contrary, we are organic and flexible. The Five Elements teach us how to grow a garden, not how to build a machine. The Elements teach us how to cultivate a healthy and happy self.

 

Learning to Love

 

Once we start to find that organic harmony within ourselves, we can begin to bring it to others. Working harmoniously with others is a gift, especially in a company or team setting. If an executive cannot co-exist, thrive and inspire their people, what good is that executive?

Intelligence, cleverness, shrewdness, handsomeness – these all fall to the wayside. If we cannot work in a balanced harmony with ourselves and with others, then we cannot make music, we make only noise. Each person’s unique note needs to be organized in such a way that music and harmony abound. Not just noise and chaos. 

To live is to experience relationships. Without human interaction, we have nothing. But first we have to love our own company. We are only lonely when we don’t like the company of ourselves. No thing and no one can live in a vacuum.

 

Part of a Glorious Oneness

 

Having harmonious relationships with others means making an effort to understand someone and to see things from their perspective. To know a person, we must know the environment in which that person exists. To understand a footstep we must first understand what the ground is and its natural relationship to the myriad things that are placed upon it. 

All things are a combination of other things. This provides the texture of our reality. We are not separate from anything. We are part of a glorious oneness that seeps into every nook and cranny of our existence. 

When one of us is strong, we are all strong. When one of us weeps, we all weep. When one of us laughs, we all laugh. There is nothing worse than believing the lie that we are alone. We have never been alone, and never will be.

 

Barn Life Recovery helps people erase negative thoughts and feel happy in their own skin. Our mental health services cover a number of different mental illnesses. Learn more about how to get involved with our community through our events.

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Barn Life is uniquely special. As someone who has had long stretches of sobriety with "traditional" communities and methods, Barn Life stepped in when I started struggling during the pandemic and said "traditional" methods failed to help.The staff here are exceptional. This is a truly subjective statement, but it is my honest opinion that the people from the owner (Hi Matt!) to EVERYONE else works there because they believe in the work and want to share the tools they found.Barn Life and their little sibling, Peer Mental Wellness were the launchpad from a shell of an existence to person with self-love/respect, and a life-mission of personal development.

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Barn life is probably one of the most amazing facilities you could ever attend when it comes to mental illness. This was the first place that popped up when I was searching for help and I’m so thankful that it did. The environment is very therapeutic, the staff is awesome, and the group discussions and activities were so helpful in me understanding what I was experiencing. Do not hesitate to be a part of this place. It’s literally a game changer. I was only there for 6 weeks but I wished I stayed at least 6 months. Ever since returning home, I’ve been much happier and my perspective has changed dramatically. I’ve done things and participated in events at my college that I never thought I would be able to do. This place is truly amazing and I’m forever grateful that I found this place.

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Through trial and error of trying to stay sober this program is definitely the most caring and supporting of them all if anyone needs help and is willing to help themselves I suggest barnlife they will for a fact give you the push you need and the tools to keep you going

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My daughter has been at Barn Life Recovery now for two months. It was my last resort to send her 9 hours away from me. She has been in drug and mental health rehabs in and out for two years. This was my last stitch effort to save my daughter and get her back to herself. Alyssa and I spoke multiple times before deciding. Their willingness to do everything for her and the different teams they have work with them is amazing. My daughter is happy again and clean and sober. She loves it there in their outpatient program. They restore your faith in humanity. They help restore someone who is broken in so many places to themselves. They have put the light back in my daughters eyes. They are committed to helping each person who truly wants the help. They assist in helping them get jobs and be responsible members of society. I recommend their program to anyone wanting to recover from drug, alcohol and mental health.Thank you to all the people at Barn Life who have made my daughter smile and bring the light back to her eyes. I am truly grateful.DawnaLee

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